Get help...

I was appalled when reading an article on marriage that talked about studying your spouse, that I couldn't answer some of the questions about my honey's favorite things.  After all, we had been married 29 years at that point.  I was also dismayed and a little frustrated when I recently learned that a meal I had been preparing most of our married life wasn't to his liking.  My response, "Really?! We've been married this long and you're just now getting around to telling me?!"  In reality, he just had not wanted to hurt my feelings. 

We are much more open about our opinions and feelings now than we have ever been during our married life.  I think it has a lot to do with us being more secure in our relationship because of "help" from books and videos and two things God has brought into our lives:  talking to each other as we walk several miles together at least 5 days each week and Financial Peace University.  Have I told you how much I love Dave Ramsey?!

Marriage Tip #4 - Get help for those difficult areas in your relationship.  If you both desire a better marriage, sit down with your spouse and make a list of the things that are irritants to the peace and unity of your relationship.  (You might need to remind each other, if tempers flare or feelings get hurt, that the purpose is to eliminate the frustrations so you can have a better marriage.)   Determine which item on the list is the most troubling and seek out help. Once that area is improved, which can take some time depending on what it is, get your list out and work on the next item of irritation.

Help comes in many forms - counselors, videos on marriage, books on marriage, pastors, a more mature couple.  Some of my favorite resources are by Norman Wright, Mark Gungor (Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage), Gary or Greg Smalley, John Trent, Les & Leslie Parrott, Gary & Barb Rosberg, and Gary Chapman (The Five Love Languages).

If your spouse is unwilling to talk about your relationship, you are still responsible for your part of the marriage.  Get help!

Decor

My honey made some floating shelves for our grandson's nursery that became an instant hit.  Five family homes now sport floating shelves of various lengths.  They are fabulous!  When I told him I was going to write about them on this blog, he was concerned that I was letting out his secrets.  I gently reminded him that he has a demanding job and is involved in ministry during the week and weekend, as well.  He does not have the energy or time to make floating shelves for everyone!

As a result, this week I will be giving instructions and showing pictures on making your own floating shelves.  They can be painted (cheaper and made with MDF) or stained (made with "stainable" wood.)  At our house, I have white painted shelves in my craft/study room and he made a long oak shelf for the den on which to display his travel momentos. 

Floating shelves:

My mom's painted shelves (chocolate brown):

Stained oak:

Tomorrow:  Instructions on making a floating shelf.

Today's Recipe - Fried Green Tomatoes
Martha Stewart

Slice green tomatoes and sprinkle with salt and pepper.  Dip in a beaten egg, then cornmeal.  Fry over low heat in olive oil until golden brown.  Drain on a paper towel.  Serve with sour cream mixed with a little dill.