Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Begging, wishing, praying...

Bargaining is the third stage of grief and is expressed by begging, wishing or praying for the situation to go away.  When my dad died, this stage was intertwined with the anger stage.  I knew the situation would not go away - Dad was gone - but I did beg for help from God to cope with the grief.  However, when I was going through the depression and all the health issues, I did try bargaining with God...a lot!  My prayers contained many pleas for God to help me to survive until the next big milestone in my daughters' lives.  All those pleas came from a place of deeply rooted fear in my heart and mind.

As I continued to study the Bible and bring my requests before God, He lead me to the truths in His Word and helped me apply what I was learning to the stronghold of fear in my life.  It took awhile to root out all the lies I had believed most of my life.  It is so freeing to know and believe the truth!

You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.       John 8:32

The point is - know that this stage is part of the grieving process.  Don't belittle yourself if you are in this stage.  Recognize it for what it is and take it to God, waiting patiently for Him to work in your heart and mind.

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. 
2 Corinthians 12:9

Note:  Nancy DeMoss has written an excellent book, The Lies Women Believe
 
Tomorrow - Stage 4...depression

Crafts

This is one of the two page spreads that were included in Mom's Grief Journal.





The left page has a program from Dad's celebration service along with some reminders from the day.  The right page left room for Mom to write down her thoughts from that day.  The yellow square is a sticky note letting her know the purpose of the page.

Today's Recipe - Maureen's Cabbage Soup
Creating Empty Bottle Moments - Clive Berkman
I had the privilege of preparing a Passover celebration meal with Clive at our church.  I learned a lot about preparing a meal for a large crowd and had a blast working with Clive.

2 pounds short ribs
1 large cabbage, shredded
28 oz can tomato puree
1 large onion, chopped
6 cups chicken broth
1 Tbsp salt
1/2 tsp cracked black pepper
1/3 cup light brown sugar
2 Tbsp lemon juice  

Place the meat in a large soup pot, cover with water, and boil over medium heat for 1/2 hour.  Remove the meat from the water and set it aside.  
Drain the water and fill the soup pot with the remaining ingredients.  Cover and bring to a boil.  Simmer for 20 minutes.  Add the meatballs and short ribs and simmer for another 10 minutes.

Meatballs
1 small onion, chopped
1 pound lean ground beef or veal
1 Tbsp plain breadcrumbs
1 tsp chicken broth powder or crushed bouillon cube
1 chopped ripe tomato, skinned and seeds removed
1 Granny Smith apple, grated
A pinch of ground ginger
1 egg, beaten
2 qts. chicken stock

Mix all the ingredients together, roll into small balls, and place them in boiling chicken stock for 10 minutes.  Then add the meatballs to the soup.

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